Happiness of all of yours in mind, but where is mine? Passion for this self destructive willing slavery ruins and wastes all of my time. Every second passing, I think of some one else and every minute I hope to please, but I see so much of so many others, I never stop to think of me. A strong little she, so pathetic indeed, you'd think she might never find her way. But she's abrupt in her ways and before you notice, she's gone from infant speak to Hemingway. Please, "don't tread on me," I've got nothing to give you and no patience left in me. I'm sorry to disappoint but so glad to be free. No chains and no boundaries, always but now you can see. I've missed myself so, and all I want is me. And now the lights that have sparkled in my head are shining so bright for myself to feel.

Drink beer, be queer;

wipe a tear from every fear swallow all your whiskey shots and don't forget your meds but remember it's different. Don't die just try to make it by all the centuries in the worst dimensions of hell. Stay strong I'll pray for you to stay well, and I love you forever. Don't you ever forget.

 

If I were a lion,

I would refrain from devouring your physical being, because I would want to be nice and eating you would be mean. If I had wings, I would give you a ride because that would be cool and I've always wanted to fly. Sometimes, in the middle of the night, I wake up and just ask why, but I already know the answer. Every now and then I cry, but I know it wont fix me any faster. And people tell me they can see there's something strange in the mess they call my brain, but I don't care, cause everyone is wrong in their own sweet way. And sometimes I wonder whats so great about accuracy, because simple guesses are so much more interesting. And when I'm dreaming I try to hold on, and bring souvenirs for when I wake, but I know that everything I'm dreaming of would come to hate this place. So I make few promises and tell few lies but sometimes its hard to be perfect when you see things through these eyes.

At the moment of surrender,

right as your white flag begins to raise, I think I catch a whiff of hope somewhere in this haze. Blinded eyes by all the lies and hurt have stopped me then but somewhere inside my irrational cries I reached a total zen. As my frustrations and everything that's held me back all begin to fall out, there's an excellent clean up crew cleaning it up off of the ground, not asking for anything in return even though I know there's so much they wish. You watched me close the door, but now the curtains in the window are moving away. I'm quietly screaming right in your face, but how can you know if I don't really say? I get this urge to say things I know I should say, but I'm afraid these apples aren't yet ripe, and if I pick them too soon they'll rot away before they bloom. The last thing I want to do is wait, but all could be doomed if I act with great haste. As hopelessness begins to rule, hope silently surfaces from a deep hidden place. And just when we all believed the end came and passed, it feels like the beginning of true freedom at last.

"And it was sweet because I'm self conscious about my forehead."